But-head

ImageMy husband and I have had one particular argument 80 billion times since we’ve said “I Do”.  Sound familiar?

Over the years, the arguing is less intense and we both are deliberately more respectful of each other during the fights—yet we haven’t reached a solution.  And honestly?  I’m not sure we will.  We both are hard-wired to be who we are and that is probably the source of the issue.

After our last go-round of heated discussion, I called him on my way to work to apologize for agitating him.  I said that he was more important to me than _______ (insert YOUR ‘Marriage Fire’) and then I stopped—I didn’t start a new sentence starting with “But…”.  Why?  Because I had read this.

It was SO HARD not to say that next “But” sentence!  My point felt SO IMPORTANT!

I honestly feel like we made significant progress with our stumbling block. It’s not fixed.  Nor do I see it being fixed anytime soon.  But when we got home from work that night, we had a very civilized conversation about the issue and a few days later, he approached me with an idea that could help.

And that felt better, I imagine, than saying my “But” sentence would have felt.

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