Love in an Elevator

Business coupleDo you remember how Jim and Pam from “The Office” relationship started?  My husband and my love story parallel’s theirs—minus the engaged-to-another-man part.  We met as coworkers.  Our “offices” (mine: a former storage closet, his: half of the secretary’s space) faced each others.  It all started when he saw an object on my desk with a verse printed on it and he asked me if I was serious about my faith.  I said, “Yes” and about a year later I did again in front of our family and friends.

Our courtship was tricky.  By no means did we do everything right.  Are you thinking about dating a coworker?  I’ve put together a short check-list of sorts based on my experience and a morning of research to help you out.

Thinking About Dating a Coworker?

  1.  Think twice – once you leave the friend/coworker level, there’s no going back.  Is this a relationship that could go the distance?  How long have actually known him?  Is he your subordinate or your supervisor?  Think maybe four times before crossing that line.
  2. Do it right – check with HR to see what policies there are regarding intra-office dating situations.  There will most likely be a ‘we’re dating’ form you have to complete.  Take care of that as soon as you’re ‘official’.
  3. Have more than work in common – I mentioned that he asked about my faith.  It turned out that there were several things we had in common outside of the office.  Which is important, since we no longer work together.  If you took work out of the equation, are you still attracted to her?  Can you have conversations with her that don’t include work?
  4. Keep your hands above the table – dating someone from work doesn’t mean you date AT work.  Be careful not to let work time become extra quality time together.  Don’t let conversations or situations become uncomfortable for your coworkers.  And that includes the disagreements, not just the PDA stuff.
  5. Have the conversation – nobody wants to start a relationship talking about the end of a relationship.  But to be fair to each other and your coworkers, talk about what happens if this doesn’t work out.  How will you continue to work together if the relationship ends?

Good luck to you!  Office relationships aren’t easy and there are many minefields to avoid.  But?  If you found the right one like I did, it will be worth it!

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